Aging in Place Part One: Navigating Changes in Friendships

August 25, 2026

Submitted by Lori K. Yauch, M.A., CCC-SLP

Meaningful Memory Maker

“Friends, you’ve got to have friends. You know the feeling’s oh so strong. I had me some friends, but now they’re gone. Something came and took them away.” (Barry Manilow, Bruce Sussman, Jack Feldman, 1973)

In the beginning, when your loved one (“Maggie”) transitioned to senior living, she made wonderful progress (settling in, making new friends, finding the services she needed to be comfortable and live independently, and putting it all together to build a happy life).

As her life takes shape, she discovers that some of her closest friends are moving away from her community.

New Adjustments

As Maggie adjusts to the news, her care partners need to remain vigilant for potential cognitive changes that may stem from her separation from close friends. The emotional impact of losing significant relationships can manifest in various ways, affecting her memory, mood, nutritional status, and overall well-being. Understanding these changes is crucial to providing the support she needs as she navigates this transition.

To further assist Maggie, her care partners and family should consider facilitating referrals to psychological and rehabilitation services. Professionals in these fields can provide coping strategies and tailored support to address the emotional impact of losing close friendships, thereby improving her overall outlook.

Look for the Signs

Research shows that a lack of friends and social contact can accelerate memory loss and negatively impact brain health. As Maggie begins this new chapter in her life, it’s essential to understand that the emotional changes she experiences may not always be obvious. The loss of her friends can lead to signs and symptoms that indicate her need for support. Being aware of these changes can help her caregivers intervene appropriately during this difficult time. Here are some key signs:

Faster memory loss: Loneliness causes the brain to age more quickly.
More sadness: People feel very down when they lose touch with peers.
Physical weakness: A lack of social life leads to less movement and poorer health.
Higher stress: Being alone raises stress chemicals in the body.
Changes in Mood: Increased anger or restless behavior.

Increased sleeping and a desire to stay in darkened rooms. This behavior often stems from depression, loneliness, or a lack of stimulation rather than a direct physical need for extra rest.

Changes in appetite, nutrition, and eating habits: Emotional isolation reduces the psychological desire for food, often called “emotional appetite”.
- Disrupted Routines: Without a companion or caregiver to prompt regular mealtimes, individuals with memory loss easily forget to eat.
- Convenience Over Quality: Isolated older adults rely more heavily on ultra-processed, easy-to-open foods that lack dense nutrition.

As noted previously, if any of these behaviors appear, a referral to supportive services, such as a psychologist and the rehabilitation team (speech-language pathologist and physical therapist), may be warranted. These professionals can provide tailored strategies to help her cope with the emotional and cognitive changes associated with losing daily contact with her friends.

To help Maggie move through this transition and prevent loneliness, her friends and family can play a crucial role in strengthening her social connections. They should actively reach out and include her in their plans. Regularly inviting her to join her favorite activities can help keep her connected.

Additionally, focusing on nutrition is essential during this time. Encouraging Maggie to join lunch or dinner outings, participate in meal preparation, or share healthy meals can enhance her health and create opportunities for social interaction.

Check the Monthly Calendar

Make a Date For:

The Movies: A weekend movie screening is an easy way for everyone to come together, share laughs, and enjoy a good film while promoting attention, short-term memory, and reminiscing.
Favorite Games: Board or card games offer a fun way to interact, keep her spirits high, and stimulate cognitive function, while providing an opportunity to reminisce with new friends about the laughter and fun she had with absent friends.
Lunch or Dinner: Whether it is out in the community at large or within her own community, sharing a meal not only fosters camaraderie and strengthens social bonds but also encourages greater consumption. This communal aspect of dining can help combat nutritional compromise, reducing the risk of weight loss and cognitive changes associated with inadequate nutrition.
Drum Circles: Music is both therapeutic and community-building; attending drum circles can promote joy and connection.
Music Appreciation Session: Listen to favorite tunes, reminisce, and enjoy live music together.

As Maggie’s friends strive to engage her in meaningful activities, her family should consider scheduling periodic sessions with a psychologist to further support Maggie’s emotional health. A mental health professional can provide insights into managing anxiety or loneliness, making her participation in social events more enjoyable.

Keep Wellness in Mind

Encourage Physical Activity: Suggest that Maggie attend movement classes, such as balloon volleyball, not only to keep her active but also to provide opportunities to socialize and make new friends. On a sunny day, accompany Maggie on a morning walk.

Promote Mindfulness: Attend meditation sessions to help reduce stress and create a shared space where Maggie and her friends can be present together.

Stay In Touch With Distant Friends: Care partners can facilitate communication with Maggie’s distant friends. Encourage them to:

Initiate phone calls or video chats to maintain relationships.
Plan return visits or casual meetups during community outings, ensuring Maggie feels supported and cherished by her broader friend circle.

While encouraging physical activity and mindfulness, continue to encourage Maggie to seek support from ancillary services. With their help, Maggie and her care partners can use strategies to enhance her engagement in these activities, thereby improving her mental and emotional health.

Wake Up and Let the Sunshine in

Morning light supports the body’s internal clock (circadian rhythm), promoting better night’s rest and more alert periods during the day. Regular exposure to daylight can reduce late-day confusion (sundowning) and increase serotonin, which can improve mood and reduce depression. Natural light in her living space can also reduce the risk of injury as her vision declines.

Make Time For Solitude

While social interactions and shared activities are essential for maintaining connections and enhancing emotional well-being, they can sometimes feel overwhelming. It’s important to recognize that time alone can play a significant role in managing stress and preventing outbursts.

Carving out quiet, calm time is crucial for Maggie. This can include simple yet meaningful activities that bring comfort. For instance, she may find solace in looking at pictures of distant friends, reminiscing about fond memories, and feeling connected despite the physical distance. These times of solitude allow Maggie to recharge and reflect. Emphasizing both social engagement and quiet contemplation can create a well-rounded support system as she navigates her new reality.

Finding Balance

Ultimately, finding this balance will not only help Maggie manage stress but also enrich her relationships, ensuring that she feels connected and valued, even in moments of solitude. Remembering that quiet time can be rejuvenating will help care partners encourage her to embrace her new phase in life holistically.

You Got To Have Friends

As Maggie settles into this new chapter of her life, it’s important to reconsider what loss means in friendships. While the lyrics that opened this article (“I had me some friends but now they’re gone”) capture the heartache of missing friends who have moved away, it doesn’t necessarily signal the end of meaningful connections.

In fact, those who remain can play a crucial role in helping Maggie cope with these changes. Support from close friends, family, and care partners can ease the transition and foster new social bonds. It’s a reminder that while some friendships may change in proximity, the connections that matter can still thrive.

Moreover, with intentional efforts from care partners to maintain communication, Maggie can keep her distant friends close. Regular phone calls, video chats, and planned visits help ensure that the friendships she values do not fade. This way, Maggie can navigate the new emotional landscape, supported by those who care about her, both near and far. By celebrating and nurturing existing relationships, Maggie can create a fulfilling social environment that enriches her life despite the physical distance of some friends.